So my last post was pretty positive.  Optimistic even.  All about finding your inner strength in times of struggle and turning disadvantages into advantages.  This will not be that type of post – this is your warning.

Regardless of how much I WANT to be positive, I have really been struggling physically and mentally the past couple of days.  I have so much going on and a lot of “mental fog,” which is one of the symptoms of Hashimoto’s.  The mental fog makes me feel like I am confused all of the time and I have been forgetting things a lot lately.  I have even been having trouble coming up with the name for things (today I called a quote mark a parenthesis and an apostrophe before I finally came up with the actual word “quote,” which is not like me at all).  I am very Type-A so I hate not feeling like I am on top of things and there is a lot going on for me this week as far as testing goes, so now is not a good time to not be mentally aware (a little foreshadowing here).

Last night I went in for an ultrasound of my thyroid and I was supposed to get blood taken for blood work as well.  Go figure – even though the scheduling office told me when I scheduled the ultrasound appointment that I didn’t need an appointment for the blood work and I could do both at the same time, the blood work place had closed at 5:00 p.m. when I showed up shortly after 5 for my 5:30 p.m. ultrasound appointment.  Cue INSANE ANGER (that’s not really a symptom although I’m sure me being on steroids longterm doesn’t help – I just have crazy anger issues).  Just more misinformation from the people who are SUPPOSED to be trying to help and fix me.  Tomorrow I took a half a day off from the office for allergy testing, so I will just have to go back to Pinnacle Health after the allergy testing to get my blood drawn.

Which brings me to my next issue – I totally forgot that I needed to stop taking my allegra 5 days before my allergy test so that the pills wouldn’t affect the results.  Unfortunately, I obviously remembered a bit late since my test is now tomorrow morning.  DAMN YOU MENTAL FOG!  There really isn’t anything I can do about the pills I have already taken, so all I can do is hold off on the allegra until after my test, which means a miserable night of hives for me.  The last allegra I took was at about midnight last night, which is not even close to the 5 days they told me to hold off (oops).  When I got my flare up at work today I only took the zantac and ended up taking prednisone #2 for the day, because I knew that just zantac would do basically nothing.  Even with the prednisone, I am sitting here flaring up with hives as I type this.  My ears, neck and face have already been hot with hives for about an hour now and more fresh hives keep popping up on other limbs.  Also, I always seem to wake up with a flare in the mornings unless I wake up in the middle of the night to take pills, so I am expecting to be ridiculously hivey and uncomfortable tomorrow morning.  Hopefully nothing on my face will be swollen.  All I will have to do is make it into the allergy test and make it through that and then I can take my little cocktail of pills and wait for relief to come again.

With that said, there is no way I would have made it through 5 days without allegra while still going to work and functioning and really – if I am still getting hives so badly even with all of the medications and it is due to an allergy, don’t you think I would still get SOME kind of a reaction if they pricked me with that same allergen?  Yeah…. I do too.  My case is so severe I feel like the meds won’t make that much of a difference with the test because seriously – the meds don’t make that much of a difference in my quality of life right now. They are just a super temporary spot treatment that reduce my symptoms for as long as they decide to last.  As it is I am sure that I will be showing up to the allergy test covered in hives as I mentioned above.

Regardless of my mistakes, I don’t need to stress myself out about things I can’t change. At least that is what I keep telling myself logically, but I can’t seem to make these feelings go away.  I feel like I am in constant panic mode.  You know that feeling like you are sure that you forgot something or something terrible is about to happen?  That feeling of impending doom – I have felt like that pretty much 24/7 the past couple of days and I just can’t seem to shake it.  I know the intense stress and anxiety is just a symptom right now and it is just an excess of cortisol and my adrenals freaking out on me, but the knowing doesn’t stop the feelings.  I know it won’t last forever though.  There will be a light at the end of the tunnel and I have a game plan, it is just time and waiting that is wearing on me.


One thought on “Mental Fog and More Testing

  1. I’m so sorry you have been feeling like this! I def know about the mental fog! Its very frustrating…torturing too in a way! Sometimes when I feel a little “floaty” I have to ask my kids to remind me where we are going when we leave our house lol! Just keep reminding yourself that it’s just a phase and it will pass (hopefully). I have hashi’s too and its def challenging to keep things in balance all the time! Check out my blog too! Take care!


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